Wednesday, July 22, 2009

9 Months


Dear Preslie,

It is hard to imagine that it has been 9 months since I held you in my arms. I remember staring down at you and thinking how beautiful you were. I have noticed with time that I do not think of all the pain and sadness all the time, although I do have moments especially lately. I can't help but feel envious of all the parents who have the opportunity to raise their children on earth. The question of why I have to wait will someday be answered. Usually the 21rst is so hard for me, but I decided to keep myself really busy. I went to WIC today and sat in the same seat with Arista that I did with you. It was difficult to explain why you were not there with me, and how difficult it has been. I miss you everyday Preslie, but everyday that goes by brings me closer to you. I often wonder how often you look in on us, and miss being with us. I know that you are doing a great work on the other side but my heart still aches for you to be here with me. I was talking to your daddy the other night and could not believe that you would be almost a year old. I got so sad to think that despite my sorrow, life still moves forward.

I can tell already that your sister Arista has a lot of your same personality traits. There have been so many times where your daddy and I call her "P", and then we realize that she is not. I know that you and your sister are close, I can feel it. I received a tender mercy last week that showed me that you too will be bonded forever. She will know everything about you, and strive to be as celestial and perfect as you are.

I wanted to write down a list of some of my favorite memories shared with you...

1. The first time I felt you kick

2. Reading to you

3. Playing music for you

4. Your daddy talking to you

5. When I dropped a pan and you jumped

6. Staying up late with you

7. Watching your little bum move

8. Feeling your hiccups

9. Seeing your beautiful face

10. Holding you

Preslie we love you so much. We pray for you every night, and hope that you are happy. We can't wait for the day where we can meet you, and see your beautiful blue eyes, and see you smile. We will never forget you.

I love you my Baby "P".

Love,

Your Mommy

6 comments:

Erin Darrington said...

I love this Rylie, even though I'll probably have to redo my eye make up now. I tii wish she was here with you, and i too am certain that she and Arista are close. Hugs to you and your family and lots of love.
Erin & Jane (she is sitting with me)

Preston and Keri said...

WOW! I can't believe it's already been 9 months.
I remember when my mom called me to tell me what happened and I remember feeling so angry. It wasn't too long before that the same thing happened to my other cousin. I couldn't understand why such a sad thing, could happen to such great people.
I know baby Preslie is with you and I know she loves you guys SO much. She is probably having so much fun playing with her little sister and telling her all about you and Chris.
I look forward to the day that you get to hold little Arista and finally take your baby home! =)

Courtney said...

Oh my friend this was so heart warming. Many hugs to you and your little baby bean =)

Aubreydoll said...

What a beautiful letter to your little girl. Usually you have me in tears but this was such a peaceful letter that I feel happy for Preslie that she has such a wonderful mom (and dad, of course) that love her so much. She and Arista will probably be as close as two sisters can be and you're so lucky to have them in your family. Love you all so much and can't wait to see you next week!

Danny and Lauren's Blog said...

Love you Rylie! (and Chris and Angel P and Baby A)

April said...

That was so sweet Rylie. Harry's 9 month is on Tuesday, I can't believe its actually been that long. How sweet that your girls are together right now waiting for Arista to come. I am glad things are going well and I pray that will.